Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon files.
Attempt to eat your computer’s mouse.
Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to a different screen than the one it’s set up with.
Borrow someone else’s keyboard by reaching over, saying “Excuse me, mind if I borrow this for a sec,” unplugging the keyboard & taking it.
Bring a chainsaw, but don’t use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say “Just in case…” mysteriously.
Bring an small tape player with a tape of really absurd sound effects.
Bring in a bunch of magnets and have fun.
Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking.
Come into the computer lab wearing several endangered species of flowers in your hair. Smile incessantly. Type a sentence, then laugh happily, exclaim “You’re such a marvel!!”, and kiss the screen. Repeat this after every sentence. As your ecstasy mounts, also hug the keyboard. Finally, hug your neighbour, then the computer assistant, and walk out.
Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray “Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease,” and scream “YES!” when it finishes.
If you’re sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” whenever there is processing time required.
Keep looking at invisible bugs and trying to swat them.
Laugh hysterically, shout “You will all perish in flames!!!” and continue working.
Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
Light candles in a circle around your terminal before starting.
Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream “NO!!! They’ve found me!” and bolt.
Play “Pong” for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab.
Point at the screen, and chant in a made up language while making elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, then leap back and yell “COVEEEEERRRRRR!” peek up from under the table, walk back to the computer and say. “Oh, good, it worked this time,” and calmly start to type again.
Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets, type by hitting the keys with a straw.
Remove your disk from the drive and hide it. Go to the lab monitor and complain that your computer ate your disk. (For special effects, put some Elmer’s Glue on or around the disk drive. Claim that the computer is drooling.)
Run into the computer lab, shout “Armageddon is here!!!!!”, then calmly sit down and begin to type.
Stare at the person’s next to your screen, look really puzzled, burst out laughing, and say “You did that?” loudly. Keep laughing; grab your stuff and leave, howling as you go.
Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper like this, then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the bad working conditions.
Try to stick a Nintendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it doesn’t work, get the supervisor.
Two words: Tesla Coil.
When doing calculations, pull out an abacus and say that sometimes the old ways are best.
Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk.
Write a program that plays the “Smurfs” theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over & over again.
Yell “DISK FIGHT!!!”
A man is looking in the classified ads for a job. He notices an advertisement for a toothbrush salesman and figured that couldn’t be such a bad job. So, he calls in, he goes in and they hire him. The next day, he heads out to a neighbourhood to make some sales. Five hours later he comes home and says, “Man, I only sold one toothbrush. That’s not enough”
With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. In response to the high demand for an answer to that question a study was done and concluded the following:
