Jonathan looked up at the biology teacher. She continued writing. He turned to Brett who was staring down at his biology paper.

“Fifty-two percent, my parents are going to kill me,” Brett wined.

“What are you worrying about? I just had a slap in the face forty-five.”

“So? What now?”

“We either wallow in self pity or pick ourselves up and move on.”

The bell rang immediately outside their classroom making everybody jump.

“Man, the entire class is tense today,” remarked Brett.

They arrived at English late after arguing with the cleaner about whether or not Brett had stolen her mop again. The English teacher looked at them angrily as they knocked at the door. Mr. Smithers was a strange man who went through much too many mood swings during the week. He asked where they had been.

“There was an accident along the way and we had to stop to direct traffic,” Jonathan replied.

“Trying to be a wise guy are we? Fine you can stay there for the rest of the lesson.”

“Great, free lesson!” Jonathon smiled; he knew he had him between his dirty little fingers.

“On second thought, come in. We’re reading through Hamlet, you can play the king.”

Jonathan wasn’t going to loose this one.

“Cool,” he said, “I’m going to need practice for ripping it off later.”

English dragged on as Hamlet’s long speeches put the class to sleep. The bell was warmly welcomed with excited chatter as the boys poured out of the classroom.

Mr. Smithers blocked the doorway stopping Jonathon in his tracks. He began his long drawn out speech, which he must have been preparing mentally throughout the lesson. He noticed Jonathon wasn’t paying attention, grabbed him by the arm and screamed for him to listen. Jonathon glared at him. Mr. Smithers continued his speech as Jonathon began to devise a sinister and brilliant plan. A plan so big and so great he would go down in the history of the school. All he needed was a rat, balloons, a siren and Mr. Smithers’ mood swings.

Brett was waiting for him outside. As they walked the bell rang out for the beginning of the next lesson. Jonathon excitedly laid out his brilliant plan for Brett to enjoy.

—

The sound of the windscreen wipers were deafening as Jonathon anticipated his big day. He had been up all night thinking it over, thoroughly analysing it from every possible viewpoint, but it was too perfect. The rain fitted in perfectly, urging his excitement on.

His mother looked at him suspiciously.

“You’re up to something, aren’t you?”

“Me? Never,” Jonathon looked at her innocently.

“If I get a phone call your birthday is off.”

“But it’s in six months.”

“Well, let’s not ruin it so early then.”

Brett was waiting for him at the front gate with all the requested items. He looked like a scrawny wet rat himself with his front teeth peering out over his bottom lip and a crazy sparkle in his eyes. They set up and made their way to their first lesson, English!

Mr. Smithers was late today, something concerned with a mysterious sign taped to his front door about his imminent death. Jonathon and Brett were unusually silent. Mr. Smithers eventually stormed in and walked straight up to Jonathon and Brett. Brett stood up and greeted Mr. Smithers, Jonathon followed adding his appreciation for Mr. Smithers’ arrival and that he would like to get on with the lesson.

“It was you, wasn’t it?”

“It was me, what sir?”

“You are the smelly little toad who stuck up the sign on my door this morning.”

“Sign sir?”

“You, you little…” At that moment a siren went off from somewhere very close. Mr. Smithers was stopped in his tracks and immediately assumed it was an emergency siren. Many of the other classes had thought the same thing and were lining up in single file outside their classrooms. Mr. Smithers grabbed his cloak from behind the door and marched the class towards the hall.

The grand hall was shrouded in a mist of chaos as the boys speculated about what was going on. The teachers themselves where discussing what could be happening when the principal rushed in looking confused and irritable. The secretary ran up to Mr. Smithers and handed him a bunch of balloons.

“These must be from the people that planted the bomb; we found them at the front gate. They had a Tag which read, ‘When the siren sounds the party begins’.”

“A bomb?”

“That’s what I think it is, you give it to the chief you’re his big friend.”

“That is true. I will take this moment to be at his right hand helping him through this difficult situation.”

“Suck up, more like,” she whispered under her breath.

The principal turned to face Mr. Smithers. Brett fired a pea at the balloons. They exploded in his face sending the principal hurling off his platform. Mr. Smithers dropped to the ground in an attempt to save the principal from his fall. To the great amusement of the school a rat peered out from Mr. Smithers’ jacket pocket. It began to crawl onto the principal’s face. The rat was drenched from the rain which had been pouring into the jacket when they were standing outside.

Jonathon slammed the siren’s button causing it to give an enormous and sudden wail. The rat shaken with fright bit the principal’s nose hard causing him to screech in pain. Mr. Smithers got such a fright he tripped over his own legs and fell on the principal sending them flying down the meter drop from the second level of the podium to the floor. This set the school into a fit of laughter. The principal pushed Mr. Smithers off angrily.

The ambulance arrived within ten minutes of the incident and both Smithers and the principal were catered to.

“Nothing too serious then chief,” Mr. Smithers remarked.

“Smithers, you’re fired,” the principal screamed. His scream shook the ambulance and sent and immediate cheer through the crowd of boys.

“Nobody touches me and gets away with it,” shouted Jonathon.

“You know it bro,” encouraged Brett.

“Well, I don’t know about you but I’m feeling a lot better than yesterday Brett. I think we’ve learnt a valuable lesson.”

“Don’t mess with the J and B,” they both shouted together. This sent them off in a fit of high fives and laughing as the tagged each other all the way to their next class.