Posts Tagged ‘neighbour’

Little Old Lady

Monday, May 18th, 2009

Little Old LadyThere was a little old lady who, every morning, stepped onto her front porch, raised her arms to the sky and shouted: ‘PRAISE THE LORD, His Love and Mercy endures forever!’

One day an atheist moved into the house next door. He became irritated at the little old lady. Every morning he’d step onto his front porch after her and yell: ‘THERE IS NO LORD!’

Time passed with the two of them carrying on this way every day.
One morning, in the middle of winter, the little old lady stepped onto her front porch and shouted: ‘PRAISE THE LORD! Please Lord, I have no food and I am starving, provide for me, oh Lord! The next morning she stepped out onto her porch and there were two huge bags of groceries sitting there.
‘PRAISE THE LORD!’ she cried out. ‘HE HAS PROVIDED GROCERIES FOR ME!’

The atheist neighbour jumped out of the hedges and shouted: ‘THERE IS NO LORD; I BOUGHT THOSE GROCERIES!’

The little old lady threw her arms into the air and shouted: ‘PRAISE THE LORD! HE HAS PROVIDED ME WITH GROCERIES AND MADE THE DEVIL PAY FOR THEM!’

Vote smart, vote on April 22nd

Saturday, April 4th, 2009

South AfricaIt becomes increasingly apparent that the South Africa I live in is very different to the South Africa our poor population lives in. This isn’t a happy thought or idea. This is a sad, hard reality that our poor have not benefited from the so called democratic South Africa. As a white, male South African, it’s easy to look at what the government is doing and say they’re more racist than ever. And although there’s an element of truth to the statement it’s a very self centred view. After all most great lies have an element of truth in them.

I was driving my domestic worker, a politically correct word for a maid, to the front of the estate I live in. She had just been paid her wages and wasted no time in opening the envelope and stashing the cash in her clothing. Imagine driving home with the results of a months worth of work and being scared that it could all be stolen. She’s leaving a secure neighbourhood for the shanty jungle. A place where your neighbour steals from you and after recouping your belongings you have to continue living next to the thief.

I am truly privileged. I am one hundred percent against any kind of discrimination, including South Africa’s version of Affirmative Action, but doesn’t it feel stupid to complain about when you have a beautiful home and food on the table?

Elections are coming up, stop letting people brainwash you and vote for the party that’s going to make a difference for all of South Africa, rich and poor. It’s not about making a few more rich people; it’s about increasing the standard of living for all South Africans. Vote smart, vote on April 22nd.

My goldfish died

Sunday, November 23rd, 2008

Dead GoldfishLittle Johnny was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbour peered over the fence.

Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was doing, he politely asked, “What are you up to there, Johnny?”

“Well, my goldfish died,” replied Johnny tearfully, without looking up, “and I’ve just buried him.”

The neighbour was concerned, “That’s an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn’t it?”

Johnny patted down the last heap of earth then replied… “That’s because he’s inside your cat!”